The massive 14-foot lizard was “caught Friday carrying the lifeless body of a Floridian down a canal.” After remains were recovered, literally from the jaws of an alligator, police in Clearwater, Florida, are asking you to give them a call if any of your neighbors are missing.
Body remains unidentified
As of Saturday, September 23, the remains recovered from the mouth of an unusually large alligator have not been identified. It’s a good thing that this one was shot and killed because it would be terrorizing the neighborhood if not.
An alert resident “first spotted the 14-foot reptile with its victim clenched between its jaws on a residential street in Largo, a small community just four miles south of Clearwater.”
JaMarcus Bullard informed local reporters that he was certain the gator had a human for lunch. “I could tell there was a body in his mouth, so I started recording.” He also fetched help.
Pinellas county deputies received calls of a dead Florida man floating around so their dive team went in and retrieved it.
They also discovered a 13 foot, 8½ inch long alligator chilling nearby.
Florida Fish and Wildlife came in, somehow got that giant bastard out of the… pic.twitter.com/DUEwkFYiue
— Donut Operator 🍩 (@DonutOperator) September 23, 2023
He was on his way to a job interview, which gave him something interesting to tell his prospective employer as an excuse for being late. Since the reptile was slithering up the grassy canal “just steps away” from the Largo Fire Department he yelled for help. “Hey, guys!!”
Emergency personnel quickly pulled the gator from the water and shot it “a few times,” Bullard relates. The body was obviously deceased before they started blasting.
Local residents aren’t surprised, gators run around like squirrels down there, Jennifer Dean points out. “A lot of my neighbors were out here and they’re the ones that told me about the gator.”
Yanked from the canal
While Dean and her friends “were standing here we heard a shot, I assume they killed the gator.” Pinellas County Sheriff’s Office “confirmed that both the victim and the gator were yanked from the canal.” They aren’t talking about who shot it though.
Deputies “refused to say whether they were the ones who pulled the trigger.” After the body was removed for examination and ID, the Fire Department probably fired up their Barbecue grill. Properly filleted and with the right seasoning in a breading, the tail from a fourteen foot alligator would make a great “alligator on a stick” lunch for half the town.
At the scene of the gruesome discovery, “investigators were standing next to the bloodied gator, which appeared to be at least 10 feet in length.” When they got the tape measure out it went down as just a shade under 14 feet.
Florida alligator found with human body in its mouth. (Video: Fox 13) pic.twitter.com/0xv8GMMIrr
— Mike Sington (@MikeSington) September 23, 2023
Officials are careful to note that they have “not yet determined the victim’s cause of death.” In other words, they aren’t sure if the gator found a body or killed the victim fresh.
Police explain that “the area is near the popular Ridgecrest Park, which includes a 5-acre lake known to house alligators.” Ms. Dean verifies that “gators routinely wander the neighborhood but the one killed Friday was one of the biggest she ever encountered.”
They aren’t usually spotted carrying around a body, either. Residents are reminded to stay vigilant and especially keep a sharp eye on children and pets.